Does He Still Love Me?

couple with back to each other( — No matter what anyone says, just about all relationships have their challenges. Also, just about all relationships experience dwindling amounts of passion and fire, especially compared to that initial “honeymoon” stage.

But how do you know when the problem is more serious?

Dear Spirit,

Please help. My sex life is quickly going down the drain. My husband and I have been married for 23 years and we used to have hot, passionate sex several times a week. Now, we barely “do it” at all, and when we do, he doesn’t seem to stay as…excited as he used to (if you know what I mean). I’ve tried everything I can think of to spice things up in the bedroom – naughty lingerie, dirty talk, and initiating spontaneous sex when my husband least expects it – but nothing seems to be working. When I try talking to my husband about it, he just gives me the old, “It’s not you, it’s me routine.” At first I thought maybe it was just a phase that we were going through, but how can I not think that it’s me when he loses his erection as soon as I touch him? Should I settle for a sexless marriage, or should I keep trying?

Shelia P., Providence, RI