The 3 Worst (And Best) Ways To Communicate

couple with back to each other
The key to successful relationships? Communication, communication, communication!

Something ironic about relationships that fail is that, while we’re recovering from heartbreak, we replay many of the past exchanges that may or may not have influenced the breakup. We find ourselves asking “Why didn’t she understand what I was asking for?” and “Why didn’t he listen to me before jumping to conclusions?”

Only then do most of us realize that much of our self expression gets lost in translation or rather, in our communication. In looking at the events and exchanges that led to the break up, chances are both of you had conflicting communication styles that didn’t work. This led to hurtful words and provided little progress in what you were trying to express or resolve.

Becoming aware of how you communicate can help in expressing how you feel, and how you help others feel loved and appreciated.

What are the three major types of communication you need to know about? And just as important – which style is the right style?

Passive Communication

The passive communicator has difficulty expressing their thoughts and feelings. They tend to hold concerns in and hope things will get better. Since it is difficult for them to express their needs, they prefer their loved ones to read their mind and understand what is wrong. This person can often be perceived as shy. They are hesitant to express their feelings since it risks the other person getting upset with them and potentially starting a fight.

Aggressive Communication

The aggressive communicator is able to express their thoughts and feelings; however they do so by offending people and not being respectful of others’ rights. They tend to lack limits or boundaries with others and have a need to be in control of their surroundings or relationships.