We’re all into “wedding season” but what about “marriage season?” Many people prepare for the wedding, but not the marriage. Here are a few things you need to know BEFORE you say “I do”…
1. Marriage doesn’t complete you.
Contrary to Jerry Maguire and all the Hollywood stories of statements like “finding the One” or “your other half,” a healthy marriage consists of two whole people who partner to create one, new body of their marriage. Even though you love this person and all that, you two are coming together, bringing all your past failures, fears and triumphs together into one marriage. You are building something great. You might benefit as a person while building with your mate, but you two are doing something new.
2. You won’t always feel attracted to your partner.
He could be as fine as (insert fine man like Idris Elba here) or as sexy as (insert sexy woman like Sanaa Lathan here), but there comes a time that even the most loving of couples aren’t “feeling” each other. We see our partners in many different lights — from elegantly dressed for a special event to retching over the toilet bowl. Even over the course of a day or an hour, attraction can fluctuate, and that’s completely normal. Know this going into a marriage. During the courting phase, preferably.
3. You won’t always like your partner.
His jokes will drive you crazy. That thing she does with her voice can irritate the mess out of you. When you spend that much time with one human being, these things can happen. We allow for this when it comes to friendships and family, but with partners, we absorb a fantasy that we’re supposed to like everything about each other all the time.
4. You don’t have to feel love to give it.
In our culture that says that love is only a feeling, it’s easy to feel confused when the…