Go easy on yourself – and others
Social skills are like any other skills, and we can fall out of practice. You may be rusty after living through the pandemic, Moyer says, and your acquaintances might feel the same.
If your friends or family seem reluctant or awkward when it comes to socializing, try not to judge them – and don’t take their hesitation personally. “It’s not necessarily about you or the relationship,” Moyer notes. Perhaps they experienced a loss or illness themselves or found that lockdowns actually reduced their pandemic-related anxiety and they don’t want to lose the sense of security, she says.
One way to gauge others’ comfort levels might be to propose a lower-risk scenario, such as a brief gathering with masks. “Allow them to take the lead in suggesting potentially more risky scenarios, such as inviting others,” Moyer adds.
Reconnect safely
The best way to minimize COVID-19 risk for yourself and your friends and family is to get vaccinated. Other protective practices recommended by the CDC include wearing masks indoors in public, avoiding crowded spaces with poor ventilation, and not attending a gathering if you have symptoms.
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Fight the inertia
“Relationships take time and effort,” Kubzansky says. During the height of the pandemic, many of the little opportunities we usually have to foster connections, such as grabbing coffee with a co-worker, weren’t possible. Maintaining relationships took a lot more energy, she notes.
She suggests fighting inertia by setting aside one time a week to check in with someone you haven’t talked to in a while. “In these times, it really requires commitment,” she shares.
Start small
Before the holiday party, plan a small get-together to ease back into things, such as a casual lunch with a few friends. A lower-stakes event will take the pressure off everyone, Moyer adds. The quick meetup might even turn into a longer conversation.
Help others
Lending a hand can be as beneficial for your own health as receiving support, Kubzansky shares. For example, a 2017 study in the journal BMC Public Health found that helping others through volunteer work was correlated with better mental and physical health, life satisfaction and social well-being. A 2007 study in the Journal of Health and Social Behavior looked at psychological well-being and found participants who were the least socially connected benefited the most from volunteering in their community.
Even a small gesture, such as holding the door open for someone or bringing a neighbor’s trash can back from the curb, can help you feel like a part of a community and make it easier to forge relationships.
Kubzansky’s last bit of advice is to stick with it. Reconnecting might not be easy at first, she concludes, but she knows from firsthand experience with her colleagues that those who made the effort “have so appreciated doing it.”