4 Reasons Why Friendships Evaporate After Saying “I Do”

African American couple drinking wine on couchA few years ago, I had my hairstylist tell me that once I get married that I can’t be hanging around people that aren’t married. It kind of threw me for a loop but after a while it made sense. There are several reasons why ties have to be cut. Or snipped at the very least with certain friends once you tie the knot. Now that I am engaged, I am starting to realize what she meant by that. Here are some reasons why:

1. Different Agendas

You simply don’t have the same ideas about life, relationships and how to spend your free time. It’s difficult maintaining the same level of friendship with someone you once spent every weekend with, when they always want to be out searching for their next one night stand. When asked about female friendships lasting after marriage, wedding expert Sharon Naylor said, “The sad reality is that sometimes they don’t survive because you no longer have anything in common.”

If you are hanging out with a single friend, having a few drinks and laughs could be on your agenda while meeting members of the opposite sex will be hers. With those being the differing agendas, naturally the both of you will attract different people during your outings. You will hopefully attract no one but the bartenders as they keep pouring the drinks. She on the other hand, staying true to her agenda will undoubtedly attract males that will possibly spill over onto you. This isn’t a good way to start a marriage, and it surely will trouble your husband.

2. Priorities Change

Once you are getting ready for marriage, life takes on a completely different meaning, at least task and responsibility wise. You are now living with someone whose name you are now sharing. The legal documentation that goes along with that alone is a huge thing to ponder over. You now probably share a bank account, and every decision you make affects another person. Adjusting to having to REALLY take someone else’s opinion into account regarding furniture, finances, how to drive (no, but seriously), leaves less time to prioritize your friends.