In most cases, how an individual approaches a romantic relationship is deeply rooted in how they were raised. It’s grounded in what they grew up seeing, feeling, believing, or experiencing.
Some may take their positive experiences and hold on to them, while others may remember bad experiences and try to avoid making those same mistakes.
On the other hand, some people may take it to the extreme. For instance, if a person never received love and affection while young, it may be something they crave and will do anything to get – which may be the start of a toxic relationship.
9 Signs of a Toxic Romantic Relationship
Think you’ve had some bad romances in your life? Check out these 7 signs of a toxic romantic relationship:
1. Control In the Relationship is Off
This sign might not be as obvious to some because it is often disguised as “caring.” In reality, it is manipulation. Some examples include one person making all the decisions and telling their partner what to do, what to wear, or who to spend time with.
They are usually unreasonably jealous and may try to isolate their partner from his or her friends and family.
2. There is Hostility Towards You for the Smallest Things
Now, this one may be a little bit more subtle at first. You may dismiss it, initially, but pay attention to the signs. Examples of this include picking fights or antagonizing their partner. This may lead to the victim changing their behavior in order to avoid upsetting the offender.
3. Dishonesty is Becoming More Consistent
Lying, stealing, or keeping information from a partner comes along with a lot of other factors. Some examples of this could be drug abuse, infidelity, or illegal activity.
READ: Toxic Relationships: 3 Tips to Overcoming From Kelis and Nas
4. Your partner is always offering “constructive criticism”…even when you don’t ask.
This can come in the form of one partner criticizing the opinions and interests of the other. Another example of this is destroying something that belongs to the victim.
5. He/She wants You More Dependent on Him/Her
An example of this includes a person expressing that they “cannot live without” their partner. They may even threaten to do something drastic to their partner or themselves if the relationship ends.
READ: How to Manage Relationship Fatigue
6. Intimidation vs. Control
Intimidation in a relationship is when a person tries to control aspects of their partner’s life by making the other partner fearful or timid.
One partner may attempt to keep his or her partner from friends and family or threaten violence or even a breakup.
7. Physical/Sexual Violence
Physical abuse in a relationship is when one uses force to get his or her way (such as hitting, slapping, grabbing, or shoving). They may also pressure or force their partner into sexual activity against their will or without consent.
8. Your partner is constantly stonewalling you.
Having a fight doesn’t mean your relationship is toxic—but if your significant other is always shutting down when you try to bring up what’s bothering you, that’s what therapists call stonewalling. Stonewalling occurs when your partner stops listening to you and says they don’t want to talk about said issue, acts unresponsive, or even straight up walks away when you want to discuss something of importance.
Healthy couples are open to each other’s feedback. Both parties should be invested in each other’s happiness and seeing what you can both do to communicate more effectively.
9. You feel drained.
If your relationship feels like it’s literally sucking the energy out of you, that’s a prime sign of toxicity. It might even manifest physically, like if you’re tired all the time.
Toxic relationships can actually make our bodies unhealthy—it’s vital to pay attention to these signs and to how our bodies are reacting.
If you feel you are in a toxic romantic relationship, it’s important to know that you can end things on your terms with the help of others if needed.
If you are ever in an emergency situation call 9-1-1 immediately. If you need help with a domestic abuse situation, please contact the National Domestic Abuse Hotline or call 1-800-799-7233.
Tia Muhammad, BS, is an award-winning freelance content & media creative, copywriter, blogger, digital designer, and marketing consultant. She owns the boutique content and digital media company, jackieGLDN|studio.