In 2008 in my late 20’s, I went for a regular annual visit and was informed I had three small fibroids developing. So when I met the man of my dreams in 2010 and got married, I knew I had some things to take care of. Statistically, many women with fibroids deliver healthy babies every day. This sadly was not my story when we started trying after two years of marriage.
I had two consecutive miscarriages and it was then we decided to seek professional help. I prayed a lot, called a few doctors I researched online and spoke with some of my closest friends asking if they knew someone who knew a good fertility doctor and surgeon.
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My fertility specialist diagnosed me with hypothyroidism, antiphospholipid syndrome and FIVE fibroids that needed to come out. So about this same time last year I underwent my myomectomy to remove the fibroids from my uterus.
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Needless to say, I was devastated, depressed and gained over 50 lbs. I could not walk or wash myself. I spent almost four weeks looking at the white ceiling in my bedroom. I am a Type A personality and never knew what depression was until this.
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During my depression I went from being an optimist, outgoing, rigidly organized, bubbly and proactive, to being a pessimist, seeing no hope for my future, overeating and staying in every chance I could get. I had no luster for life and a constant overwhelming feeling of failure.
The other part that made me cry was the strain this put on my marriage and the feelings of failing my husband. In hindsight, the turmoil was mostly internal. The negative voices in my head would play this tape, You are a woman so the least I should be able to do is bear children.
My husband is a very patient man, so we survived that storm and are still together. We have a deeper connection and love for one another now. I truly believe God and the love of my family and friends carried me through.
I am not a mother yet, but I am believing and praying I will be one day soon. I have finally lost 15 lbs and can run again! I had to fight for every inch while keeping my sanity.
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If you are facing the same issue you MUST become your own advocate and be proactive. Work with your doctors because you know your body better than they do. Seek help. Don’t be ashamed or embarrassed. Our bodies all work differently, so seek fertility counseling, grief counseling, pastoral care and talk to your friends.
You are not in this alone.
Vunzai Yeazel shares the power of her testimony and lessons on life, family and fitness through her Gorgeous Within movement. To learn more, visit www.GorgeousWithin.com or Gorgeous Within TV. You can also reach out to her on Twitter @GorgeousWithin.
Visit the BlackDoctor.org Fibroids center for more articles.
