How The ‘Romance Jar’ Can Spice Up Your Sex Life

love note jarBeing in a relationship for an extended amount of time can cause couples to settle into a sexual routine, but there are fun and creative ways to spice up your sex life without impeding upon your regular schedule. Spontaneity always brings excitement to any situation, and by including the element of surprise into intimate affairs sex can become invigorated once again. A fun and inexpensive way to incorporate intimacy-building techniques as well as fun sexual escapades into weekly plans is to create a ‘romance jar’.

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This jar can be created from a large pickle jar or any type of large container that has an opening wide enough to place your hand in. This jar should be placed in a neutral spot within the home where it can be seen easily. This is a project that both partners can participate in together as a way to build upon teamwork.

The romance jar will contain several small pieces of paper with written instruction for a sexual act that should be performed. Whether it’s an act of intimacy, a service one love has to do for the other or a freaky request, there are no limits to what can be placed in the romance jar.

There should be enough commands in the jar to fill it up to the top, so this means each lover’s skills of creativity must be used for this process. Anything that either partner has ever wanted to experience romantically or sexually should be included in the romance jar, and once a command is chosen each lover has to commit to performing the act on the card within three days of drawing.

If the act is not delivered, there is a penalty that is to be paid (that penalty could be dish duty for a week or walking the dog nightly for a week; the penalty is whatever you choose for it to be). The day of the draw can be determined by both partners and the command each pulls should not be shared with the other.

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The goal of the romance jar is to create scenarios that deepen intimacy and the bond in the relationship. Fill the jar with whatever fantasies you desire. It’s all about trying things that wouldn’t normally be incorporated daily. Playing dress up, role playing, one partner feeding the other, naked body massage and blindfolded oral are just a few sexually creative ideas to add to the jar. Just remember to have fun safely.


Tyomi MorganGlamazon Tyomi is a freelance writer, model and sex educator with a deeply rooted passion for spreading the message of sex positivity and encouraging the masses to embrace their sexuality. Her website,, reaches internationally as a source for advice and information for the sexually active/curious. Follow her on Twitter at @glamazontyomi.