feels as if it is a requirement before marriage or monogamous commitment. You can hear examples of struggle love throughout our communities when some men explain why they chose their spouse.
It usually sounds something like“She stood by me through everything”, similar to a recent Instagram post from Gucci Mane about his wife, Keyshia Kaoir. As if enduring the pain of struggle love is a reason for reward, honor, and commitment. Our families are full of relationships built on struggle love. Our friendships have stories of struggle love. Even some of our churches are led by men whose wives are survivors of struggle love. For generations, black women have accepted pain before love.
While I’m sure there are black men who’ve waited for their partner to get it right, it’s usually the other way around. In our community, we expect black women to love black men until they are ready to reciprocate that love. However, black men usually do a great job of walking away when they see red flags. They should continue to do so as struggle love is actually harmful to the recipient.
Now, I’m a matchmaker and not a doctor. I’m not at all suggesting you start taking Tylenol for heartbreak. I’m simply