the books told me to say, then waited for my offer. Confident that I was well worth the expected and even listed offer I saw on their careers page, I anticipated the callback. I was excited. If I had landed this job, it would be the most I had ever earned in my writing career.
The next day the call came, but the presumed salary was a bit off. $5,000 off to be exact. Yet, as a black woman, I was already mentally prepared for this part. I was told my entire life by my mother, friends, and society that as a black woman that I had to work twice as hard as any other race or gender to get what I wanted. It was subconsciously ingrained in me and is still lingering in me until this day. A lot of us were told if you want something, no one is going to just give it to you.
Where did we get this conditioning from? Why did I have to work harder than Becky and Katie? Why in the hell did they seem to always get cut “a break” over and over again because of their white skin, wealth and status? These questions would often arise in my psyche, and I would entertain the thought, but would eventually ignore it and get back to work. After a while, I started to ignore a lot more things. You see, I was a hard worker and everyone knew that. Not only was I a hard worker, but I was passionate and good at what I did.
As people transitioned in and out of positions, I became the “go to girl” for lost documents that suddenly drifted away, phone calls that never got answered, and “small” projects that got abandoned by the last. As I saw the head of our operations team storm out of the building with her computer and bags packed, I knew it wouldn’t be long before that would be me. As a white woman, if she couldn’t do it, then how the hell was I going to last?
This particular corporation was different though. There were absolutely no outside