I still remember the night that she died at only 45 years old. We were there with her, by her side, as she took her last breath. It was the worst night of my life. I remember screaming and collapsing to the floor. Although my family surrounded me, I felt scared, alone, and empty inside.
BlackDoctor.org: How did losing your mom to breast cancer impact your approach to health and wellness?
LG: For a while after my mother’s death, my approach was to deny, deny, deny. I didn’t want to think about breast cancer because it hurt too much, and since breast cancer stole my mother away from me, I was scared of it. Secretly, I believed it would become my own fate, and that I would have a similar experience as my mother. I was worried about my sisters. What would happen if I lost them, too? Breast cancer was “the pink elephant in the room”, don’t speak about it, don’t think about it and it won’t exist. But it did exist and I felt like it was a dark cloud over all of us.
It wasn’t until I connected with Bright Pink that I learned more about preventive care. The first step was learning how to talk about my family history and more specifically my mother. Her cancer diagnosis is a gut-wrenching part of my health history. I learned how to speak to my doctor about my concerns. I began a health care plan that involves early screening due to my increased risk based on my family history, living a healthier lifestyle, and eventually I underwent genetic testing. Most importantly, I learned that denying my family health history would not change it, nor would it change the potential impact that history had on my own health. I came to understand that denying it would not reverse the death of my mother and could even be dangerous to my health.
BlackDoctor.org: What types of questions should women ask their doctor, particularly when they have a family history of breast cancer?
LG: For me, asking my doctor for a referral for my first mammogram was the most difficult question. I dreaded this conversation because asking it made my mother’s death and my personal risk a reality. However, scheduling my first mammogram 7 years ago was an important step in my health care journey. I was nervous and scared but more importantly, I was taking care of my health and myself.
Bright Pink teaches women to visit a trusted healthcare provider at least once a year, even when we feel perfectly healthy, for an annual well-woman’s exam. At this visit or any other, your provider should take time to answer your questions, so be sure to come prepared! Bright Pink recommends women ask:
- What factors are increasing my risk of breast and ovarian cancer?
- Based on my personal risk level, what should my risk-reduction and screening plan include?
- What lifestyle changes can I make to reduce my risk for developing breast and ovarian cancer?
BlackDoctor.org: What has going through this journey taught you about yourself?
LG: This entire journey has taught me that my health is a priority. Yes, breast cancer is real and it is scary, but I learned I do not have to be passive – and honestly, I do not want to be. My journey has educated me. I prepare my questions before my doctor visits to help facilitate my conversation. I am sure to do my self-breast exams and so I am aware of my body and if I notice any changes/differences, I ask my doctor about them. I have learned to openly discuss my experiences. I have found more emotional stability in sharing my journey with other women. There are so many women with similar experiences as mine, they are just like me. These women have taught me so much and given me advice, support and confidence. I learned that I really am not alone, none of us are.