5. “I bet you burn incense.”
What? Where does this logic come from? What does incense have to do with what I decide to do with my hair follicles? I should probably just assume you dropped out of school in the 4th grade, too, because clearly you aren’t smarter than a 5th grader.
6. “Why don’t you comb your hair?”
Excuse me! I will have you know that I actually did comb my hair and that it took me roughly three hours plus 24 hours of drying time to get this style. How about you actually do something to your own head before coming into my space to offer unsolicited hair critiques and advice.
7. “I bet your hair will look cute straight!”
Sooooo….are you saying that my hair is not looking cute right now? Are you saying that in order for my hair to look cute it needs to be straight? What are you saying? I will tell you that my side eye is totally telling you to STFU.
8. “Can I touch your hair?”
As a current cosmetology student I recently had to amend and make changes to this rule. Outside of beauty students and beauty professionals, randomly asking to touch my hair while I’m moving and shaking through the Universe will get you 20 seconds in the Resting B— Face zone.
9. “Looks like you’re having a bad hair day.”
If I did not share this with you in conversation, please don’t have a temporary case of Tourette’s and blurt out such a statement. You will be read for filth and I will curse your mom and dad for raising such a sad, vile, pitiful human being.
And last but certainly not least….
10. “You just need to get a perm!”
What you NEED to do is take an about face and ride up out of my face. Are you a part of the Unsolicited Hair Authority, self summoned to share your unsolicited hair advice with friends, family and complete strangers? Bye, dude. I do not care to provide you with an unauthorized evaluation of your fragile and decimated follicles. Please go on or I will be forced to torture your eyes with a natural tear cleanse.
I can’t speak for the entire community. However, at the end of the day if it isn’t nice, necessary or kind just keep it to yourself. Mmmkay?
Aishia Strickland is full-time mom to a little Chocolate Prince, full-time beauty school student, lover of multi-textured hair, tastemaker, Editor of Chocolate Curls Beauty and a knower of all THINGS!