… mitts. But when he took R.J. to the park, the boy was only interested in throwing rocks into a nearby creek, over and over. Some days, he would kick the soccer ball. Then it could be days before that would happen again.
Rodney finally realized that learning to venture into his son’s world was a better option than trying to make R.J. a part of his. Once he was committed to “Team R.J.,” he says, he began taking the child to and from appointments – from three hours a day at a special school, to all the therapies the doctors had recommended.
Through it all, Rodney says, he began to learn how to work with his son and got down on the floor to play. This interaction technique, called Floortime therapy, is a way for parents and therapists to deeply engage autistic children in activities and problem solving.
“When I moved past my denial of R.J.’s condition, I was surprised by how I felt,” he explains in the book. “I felt liberated. Sure, at first I’d mourned the vision I’d had of the kind of father I would be to R.J. And I understood that I had to let go of all the images of fatherhood that I’d received from movies and television – from Ward Cleaver to Cliff Huxtable. I wanted to have as loving a relationship with R.J. as I’d enjoyed with my own dad, but I had to come to terms with the fact that it couldn’t be exactly the same.”
Since the diagnosis, the Beverly Hills family has grown with sons Robinson, 11, and Roman, 9. Each member has his or her own role in R.J.’s progress.
While his parents focus on a bigger picture that includes school, his twin sister, Ryan, 16, acts as his protector. The younger boys always want to play, which keeps R.J. engaged and working on his social skills, a challenge faced by those with autism.
R.J. has learned to look his parents in the eyes, tell them he loves them and even has asked for spaghetti for dinner. He’s made friends, plays soccer and basketball and is getting ready for middle school. He even appears on Fox Sports Net’s “Kid Pitch” with a segment of his own, “Stump Rodney.”
“We were nervous about it at first because he has autism and we didn’t want people to make fun of him. We’re protective of him. We were thrilled he wanted to do it,” says the former co-star of “21 Jump Street” and “Hangin’ with Mister Cooper.” “It’s a great opportunity for Rodney to represent the strength and uniqueness of kids who have autism.”
Yet, with any child, as they grow, new challenges arise. For the Peetes, it’s puberty. For young adults on the autism spectrum, this stage of development causes more confusion, aggression and some regression in the progresses made, Holly says.
“It’s very, very hard for him to sort out all of those hormones,” she says. “We are now faced with a new set of challenges.”
Ryan, R.J.’s twin, has joined her parents in reaching out to the community in sharing her experience with autism. She recently collaborated with her mom on a fictional children’s book, “My Brother Charlie,” based on her childhood experience with R.J.
Holly also has written her own book about autism and is active in the autism community, especially with Walk Now for Autism, which takes place Saturday at the