The weeks of summer are quickly coming to an end, and along with the roundup of these summer months come diminishing flings only built for the summer. Breaking up can be difficult to do, especially when the relationship was only meant for a moment. If you’re in a fling that has come to an end and are confused about how to leave the relationship on good terms, here are five ways to cool down that summer romance.
1. Be honest.
Sometimes relationships last longer out of fear of hurting the other person’s feelings about ending what may be a good experience for them, but as sensitive of an area this may be to tread in, the best thing you can do is be one hundred percent real about what you want. If ending the relationship is what you seek, be honest with your partner about your desires to move on. It may hurt for a moment, but it stings much less than being betrayed and strung along in the process.
2. Sever ties face to face.
Living in a world where most day-to-day interactions involve electronics can turn anyone into a passive aggressive when it’s time to communicate about topics that are sensitive in nature. Be authentic and respectful of the experience and break the news with the person face to face. Not only does it show him or her that you’re serious about calling it quits, but it also shows them that you respect their feelings enough to be honest in person. Breaking up or cutting ties via text message gets interpreted as a blow off, and no one likes to feel as if they are dispensable.
3. Reduce intimate interactions.
The urge to dip back into the “honey pot” may be strong when leaving one relationship in search of another, but in order to truly free yourself from a relationship that has ran its course you must cut the ties of intimacy, too. Sex, long walks on the beach, boo loving on the phone —all of these things must be left to the past if what you truly seek is to move on from a relationship with this person. Leave the experiences in the past and make the boundaries clear to your former partner to avoid confusion or drama in the future.
4. Encourage dating.
This is a classic sign that things are about to end. To begin suggesting that your current partner begins to date other people is a sign that you are done with the relationship. Encouraging one to date could serve as a segue into the conversation about breaking things off. Remember, being honest is of highest priority.
5. Be real about what it was.
In the beginning of any relationship the agreement always starts out as something that it never ends as. People change, and a relationship that was once a mutual understanding can turn into something completely different over time for one or both partners. Once the fling has run its course, it is important to revisit the original agreement between you and your partner, especially in the case of a fling. “Hooking up” or being “friends with benefits” for a time can sometimes make one believe the relationship has developed into more than just a meantime fling. Revisit the agreement and let your partner down easy. No one ever wants to be on any end of a breakup, but how the let-down is delivered makes all the difference.