Let’s chat for a minute. Work is something we all have to do at some point in our lives be it school work, housework, wage-able work, and the list can go on and on. Often times we find ourselves spending more time with our coworkers than we even do with our family. Work allows us to live the lifestyle we both need and want.
Through work, we are able to afford the amenities that bring us joy and it also gives us a sense of self-worth in knowing we are able to provide for ourselves and our families. Sometimes work can connect us to our true meaning in life and unlock the doors to our life’s purpose. Other times work can prove to be one our leading stressors and biggest contributors to the detriment of our health. That’s another article I’ll write at a different time.
However, the point remains work plays a huge role in our day to day lives. Along with that comes work relationships. I’ve personally made some really close friends through work relationships. I’ve also made some enemies, although most people love me because I’m lovable AF. I’m sure many of you can relate. We’re always warned to set parameters around the “depth” of our work relationships because after all it is work and professional etiquette must be honored. There’s always been a sort of stigma around work friendships vs real friendships.
But what happens when a work friendship paired with casual flirting with a co-worker ends up as aNetflix and chill situation. If you’ve ever been there or have some sort of imagination you would probably ask yourself how did this happen and where do we go from here…
So you had sex with a co-worker, what do you do next? Of course, I’m here to give you some pointers on what to do once you’ve crossed that line and had sex with a co-worker.
1. RELAX
Before you go off the deep end into a panic and extreme anxiety, take a deep breath and relax. Sleeping with a coworker is not as uncommon or taboo as one might imagine. Business insiders report that a surprising 54% of workers have had a “romantic” interaction with someone in the workplace. That’s more than half so it shows how far from uncommon it is. If you ever end up in this type of situation just relax and follow my next few tips to keep things “professional.”
2. Calculate The Risk
After you’ve come back from the deep end and had a chance to breathe and relax its time to think strategically and reallycalculate the risks of what this means for your career and work environment. Nobody wants a hostile or awkward work environment. In this day and age, it’s quite common for us to “Netflix and Chill” and then ghost.
For those of us unfamiliar with “ghosting” it’s when one moment you’re dating someone and talking to them often, then BOOM either you or they disappear and the “relationship” is over. It’s incredibly difficult to ghost someone you see every day and are forced to interact with. For this very reason, it’s important to calculate the risk and strategically plan the next steps. This coworker could blossom into a beautiful relationship or it could end up on your list of life’s regrets. Either way, you have to calculate the risk and also your risk tolerance for what the next steps could lead to. After all, no risk no reward right?
2. Be Honest and Direct
I’ve noticed among my age group (Millennials) honest, direct, and open communication is one of the most bragged about traits but in actuality is one of the hardest things for people to execute efficiently. We’re in an age where everyone keeps it “real” but no one is in fact, real. Being honest and direct about how you feel and how you would like to proceed next takes wit and tact. Remember, with this tip delivery is key! Mama always said it’s not what you say but how you say it.
3. Maintain Boundaries
In the spirit of keeping things professional after this encounter, maintaining boundaries is especially important in the workplace. This is critical because you don’t want this encounter to sabotage your career. You have to be especially clear to set boundaries and maintain them. Work is work and after work is, well, a different story if you catch my drift. Focus on the task at hand, being great at your job and progressing to that next level. Don’t allow the distraction of sex with a co-worker throw you off your game and negatively impact your work performance.
4. Lose the Stigma and Keep Hope Alive
Opportunities are endless and no one knows whats in store for the future. I’ve witnessed first hand some of the most successful marriages and relationships begin as an untimely romantic work encounter. Think of it this way, we spend most of our time with these people, we have common interests, we share similar values. All of these combined can be a recipe for a successful relationship. I’m not saying you will always get the happy ending, but what I am saying is why not give it a shot if your coworker is someone you can see a lifetime with. Keep hope alive, besides being normal is overrated.
If you follow these tips you could end up either married or left with a good story for your best friend. Either way, sleeping with a coworker can be something you can bounce back from. Don’t freak out! You got this champ! I have faith in you!