It’s important to talk to kids about family health risks, but what impact will sharing this kind of information have on your child? BRCA gene
It’s probably safe, according to a new study, but how are you supposed to do it — and when?
How children cope with the news
Researchers found that kids generally have no problem coping when cancer risk information is shared with them. But it’s not uncommon for parents to struggle with communicating the news.
So if you are understandably having challenges finding the right time to deliver the news to your child, what should you do?
“We often tell parents sometimes conversations happen when you least expect them, like in a car ride to a sporting event or a family gathering,” says study co-author Beth Peshkin, director of genetic counseling at Georgetown University’s Lombardi Comprehensive Cancer Center in Washington, D.C.
There are also natural opportunities to talk about these serious issues — for instance, around the time of Mom’s annual mammogram. For that reason, it’s important to ask yourself the big questions ahead of time.
“When do you see yourself sharing this info? How would you feel if your kid asked or found out about it around you?” Peshkin shares, adding that it’s important to consider a child’s mental development and to decide whether and what to share on a case-by-case basis.
“Particularly with younger kids, give them a little bit and see if they want more,” she suggests.
You May Also Like
This study included 272 teens and young adults — 76.1% had a mother who had survived breast or ovarian cancer, and 17.3% had mothers who tested positive for the BRCA gene, putting them at risk for those two cancers.
After learning about their mothers’ BRCA status, young people reported relatively low levels of psychological stress.
Knowledge is power
“To me the biggest takeaway is that knowledge and information is power,” says Kelsey Largen, a clinical pediatric psychologist whose work focuses on cancer and blood disorders at Hassenfeld Children’s Hospital at NYU Langone in New York City.
“By learning this knowledge about their parents, these children then have the opportunity to make changes to their lifestyle or prepare for a challenge ahead. I think that’s always beneficial,” says Largen.
But the study, published July 21 in Pediatrics, also found that even when kids were presented with this information, it wasn’t likely to change their behavior. Knowledge about the cancer risk didn’t stop them from smoking and didn’t prompt them to drink less or exercise more.
“The takeaway for us was that even though we didn’t see overall changes in what kids were doing when it came to smoking, alcohol use or exercise, there was awareness,” Peshkin shares. “I think that’s key to capitalizing on this. Maybe they weren’t given any tools or any formal way to explore how to resolve this.”
While more research is needed, clear pathways to take action after the news is revealed could be a way to change future behavior.
RELATED: Breast Cancer And BRCA Testing: What You Need To Know BRCA gene
How to help your child cope with the news
“If I were talking to a young adult whose parent found they have this mutation, I would look at it in terms of coping. To say, ‘You don’t have this [illness] right now, but if you were to face this, there are resources available to you if this should happen in the future. We can talk about how you can use these coping skills to deal with challenges as they arise,'” Largen adds.
“As a psychologist that’s what I would think about,” she says. “How are they coping with the news? How can we help them prepare emotionally?”
But ultimately, it’s a good sign that kids are resilient and able to handle important information. Parents shouldn’t avoid it or opportunities to talk — kids will be OK.
“We’re often trying to convince parents to share information with their child when it comes to cancer, because we know the more information [the kids] have the better they cope,” Largen concludes.
As you can see sharing this news with your child can be helpful. How and when you decide to do it is up to you, but ultimately, it helps to choose the appropriate language when talking to your child. How old is your child? How much you share should be based on your child’s age. Lastly, make the conversation friendly and inviting. Let your child know that they can engage and ask questions.
