Back to school season is in full effect and many children will be split between two homes because of the nature of their parent’s relationship. Many parents share the responsibility for raising a child and agree to co-parent when a romantic relationship doesn’t seem to be the right move for their lives, but when school starts up demands begin to flood and schedules can become demanding.
Adding junior’s basketball practice and baby girl’s cheerleading meetups to an over demanding work schedule can sometimes pose an issue for co-parenting adults who are seeking to make things easy for themselves and their children, but there are solutions to this issue. Chicago-based clinical sexologist and sex therapist Dr. TaMara Griffin has a few tips on how parents can create synergy in co-parenting during this back to school season.
It’s important for parents to share childcare responsibilities equally, and to do so, clear communication is necessary to run smoothly from day to day. “Have the conversation prior to the beginning of school to agree on your roles and responsibilities when it comes to working with your child's teacher(s),” Dr. Griffin says.
“For example, who will be the point of contact, who will pick the child up from school, etc. Resolving these concerns on the front end helps to minimize confusion on the back end.”Along with clear and consistent communication, parents must agree to do what’s in the best interest of the child which may mean putting aside differences to make it work. “Bickering parents can contribute to a child's frustration, depression and anxiety,” says Dr. Griffin. “This can result in low academic performance, lack of social skills and/or behavioral challenges. Put your adult differences aside and make the child the number one priority.”
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The family dynamic of a child should be one of love, unity and support. By working together and being a system of support for the child parents are setting a positive example of how differences can be absolved with a little bit of teamwork. Dr. Griffin advises separated parents to combine forces and know how to be good examples for their children.
“When it comes to your child's education, join forces and present a united front,” Dr. Griffin says. “It's already difficult and complicated at home, the last thing your child needs is for it to be difficult and complicated at school."
Dr. Griffin adds, "Working together as a team demonstrates to the school system, principal, teachers, other staff and faculty that you care more about the success of your child than your personal differences. In fact, the only reason the school should have any clue that you're not together is because you have different addresses! Keep your personal adult mess away from your child's school. Because the last thing you want is to have child protective services and the schools involved in a long drawn out custody dispute.”
For more information about how to make a co-parenting situation work or to talk to Dr. TaMara Griffin directly log on to www.drtamaragriffin.com.
Glamazon Tyomi is a freelance writer, model and sex educator with a deeply rooted passion for spreading the message of sex positivity and encouraging the masses to embrace their sexuality. Her website, www.sexperttyomi.com, reaches internationally as a source for advice and information for the sexually active/curious. Follow her on Twitter at @glamazontyomi and the all-new “Glamazon Tyomi’s Sex Academy” radio show here.
