3. Don’t Say: “I’m not attractive/smart/rich/young/hot enough.”
Here’s what’s wrong with this reasoning: You’re taking the opinions of strangers too personally. If someone doesn’t want to date you, it’s not about you personally, it’s about the connection (or lack thereof). It’s about the fact that you don’t share a romantic connection with this particular person. You might be face to face with someone who has all the qualities you want in a partner on paper — smart, funny, attractive, driven, comes from a good family — but no matter how many matches you strike, you can’t seem to fire up that crucial spark that sets your hearts aflame. That’s all the proof you need to know it’s not about you; the right partner will be just as into you, too. Forget about what people might think of you and focus on the connection you feel instead.
What To Do: Fall In Love With Your Body. What a great way to get to know yourself again. Start with reconnecting with your body by doing weekly exercises. It gets your body moving and your pushes out endorphines which make you, and the people around you feel better! Your body is the only one you have this lifetime and we often look after our cars (which we can trade in) better than our bodies. Singledom is the perfect time to get yourself in shape and the endorphins released when you work out keep your spirits flying high.
4. Don’t Say: “Men/Women just don’t like people like me.”
Yes, they do! Do you have a friend? Does one human being out there enjoy spending time with you? Then people do like you — you just haven’t made that specific romantic connection with anyone…yet.
What To Do: Rediscover your creativity. We all have the ability to create magnificence. You may have temporarily forgotten what you came here to create, but if you spend enough time alone you will rediscover your creative self. What a perfect opportunity to play when no one is watching. So take out those pencils, paints, clay, inventions, designs and let loose.
5. Don’t Say: “I’m better at being single. I guess I’m just supposed to stay single forever.”
Just because one failed relationship brought you down doesn’t mean you’re meant to be alone for life. You’re allowed to be “good” at being single. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with enjoying time alone. However, your single status is only “permanent” if you choose to keep it that way.
What To Do: Study Something New. Wow, what a perfect time in your life to go to night school or study online or completely change career tracks. Figure out what you are passionate about and go for it. There is no one to hold you back but yourself.
Not sure what you are passionate about? Spend more time alone. It will come to you. Give yourself a chance to listen to your inner voice. This process can take time and you really have to be patient with yourself.
Above all, remember one simple dating truth: you’re currently single because you haven’t found a specific person you want to settle down with who loves you completely. That’s the real reason you’re single. But if you want a relationship, decide right now that you’re meant to be in one and watch the dating world flock to you and your aura of optimism.