Mistakes in love aren’t easy. More than likely, you’d love to just forget them. But, were these errors in judgement a complete waste of time? Not necessarily.
“Mistakes in relationships represent one of the best ways we can learn what we like and don’t like, and what others like and don’t like,” explains Maryanne Fisher, Ph.D., an associate professor in the Department of Psychology at Saint Mary’s University in Halifax, Canada and coauthor of The Complete Idiot’s Guide to the Chemistry of Love. “They also help us push our boundaries. Mistakes represent fantastic opportunities for growth.”
That said, don’t be afraid to commit these four classic dating don’ts…and embrace the wisdom that can from them:
Confess Your Love Too Soon
Why: This is easily one of the most classic dating mistakes of all time. Still, being cautious isn’t always the best way to play it in real life. Do you really want to conduct your love life as if it’s some carefully planned military operation?
How: If you do blurt out those three little words and later regret it, you can recover without changing your cell phone number. Just explain that you were wrapped up in the moment and are of a calmer mind now.
Lesson learned: Sometimes blurting out how you feel is the right thing to do. Would it really be so bad if more people stopped being so afraid to express their true feelings of love?
Give The Relationship Another Chance
Why: This “mistake” could be the right thing for you. “In many cases it would be unwise because you have all this baggage as a couple,” Fisher concedes. “However, getting back together and working through that baggage could be useful. It might help you determine why the relationship ended, if that’s still unresolved, or it might actually lead to a stronger, healthier relationship with that person.”
How: Approach things slowly, make sure you both spend enough quality time together and away from each other, communicate with each other honestly, and be very aware of the fact that there is a difference between missing someone and needing them back in your life.
Lesson learned: Finding a real connection with someone isn’t something one should dismiss too easily, after all. Making this particular mistake shows you understand that relationships can come with some bumps in the road and…