“I’m so stressed!” If I had a dollar for every time I heard that, I would never work another day in my life. Seriously speaking, stress is inescapable. How you react to it, though, is everything. Make up your mind that you will choose your responses.
I lost my father a month before my final exams. These were final exams that would determine whether I graduated or not. It was the most stressful time, to say the least.
When I moved to England, after passing my exams, it took me seven months to get a job, and I was trying to plan my wedding. Stressful…
No one has not been through stress, in various forms. Sometimes what constitutes stress to one person is not to another. Sometimes many little things combine to become one big overwhelming mess.
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Manage stress with these tips:
1. Focus on the positive.
When my father died, I was surrounded by so much love from my friends. My boyfriend was at my beck and call encouraging me all the time. Sometimes after I spent most of my waking moments crying, my friend Francisca would come and read to me in the evenings.
My class representatives had a class test canceled so that they could support me by attending my father’s funeral. I was grateful for all that. Yes, my father had died, but I had good friends.
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2. Take mental breaks.
Every day, make it a point to take 15 to 30 minutes of quiet time to do nothing. Do not plan, plot, or pray. Just. Be. Quiet.
So, full disclosure here, I am still working on this, but I do find that when I feel the most overwhelmed, and I pull back and take a quiet moment, I get clarity and feel better.
Every few weeks or so, take a vacation. If you cannot take a vacation, do something enjoyable to create nice memories and break the monotony. Or you can take a mini-retreat, even if it is just for a few hours.
3. Blow off steam.
There is no better way to safely blow off steam than to exercise. Run. Lift weights. Do push-ups. Sing loudly (if your voice is not melodious, you may want to confine your singing to the shower, lol). Exercise releases endorphins, which are the body’s happy hormones.
These make you feel good in the moment as well as afterward. Blowing off steam also serves as a momentary distraction from the things that are bothering you.
4. Talk it out.
Talk things out with a trusted friend. I have friends that I can always take my stuff to. Now, this does not mean running from person to person rehearsing your problems.
Some people do not wish you well, some people do not care and some people will make matters worse. Talk to trusted friends and not too many at a time.
5. Connect with God.
I pray to God about things that bother me. Prayer helps you find peace, focus your heart, get wisdom and find answers.
A few years ago, I was going through a tough time with some of my relationships. I was overwhelmed at work due to a sudden surge in my workload. I developed severe heartburn that even ranitidine (Zantac) would not work on!
As I prayed about it, I was inspired to read and meditate on peace verses from the Bible. As I concentrated on peace and the peace of God, an amazing thing happened. I knew what I needed to do to handle my work and the heartburn disappeared. The relationships that I was so troubled about, came into perspective and I did not worry any longer. Eventually, the people who were causing me this stress waltzed out of my life, as I refused to get sucked into their drama.
Shola Ezeokoli is medical doctor, a life coach a two time Amazon No 1 bestselling author and a public speaker. Shola works with purposeful women, helping them get liberated from survival mode and truly live the life that they want to live. Her coaching niche is Balanced Living and this is based on the five pillars of balance: Physical, Emotional, Relational, Mental, and Spiritual. She does this through her program called Discover, Balance, Activate. She has written three books, His Delight, Shoetry and You Are The Best You (which has a companion Workbook). She has a fourth book which she co-wrote with her husband, Staying Married: 7 Key Strategies You Cannot Do Without. She blogs at sholashade.com on matters related to balanced living.
