Would you like to OM?
OM can be achieved without a partner, or “stroker.” However, the more common practice involves a certified OM coach and a strokee, the woman receiving the stroking. An OM session is initiated by simply asking “Would you like to OM?” If you are practicing with your partner at home, asking to OM prepares your partner to shift there focus from what would normally become a sexual experience (where the focus is solely on achieving a climax) to focusing on achieving… nothing.
“OM is goal-less. Being goal-less takes the pressure off. There’s simply no way to do it wrong. There’s nowhere to get to and there’s nothing to achieve for either the woman or her stroker. The only thing that’s required is they notice what they’re feeling. Ultimately, OM is a practice. So you don’t need to be turned on or in the mood to do it,” said Daedone in an instructional video.
OM is performed in a “nest,” or yoga mat (or blanket) surrounded by pillows for the strokee and stroker’s comfort. The strokee undresses from the waist down and lies on the mat with her legs in a butterfly position. The stroker positions themselves on her right side, with their left leg over her waist and their right leg under her knees.
“The stroker positions himself, puts on gloves, some lube, and sets the timer for 15 minutes. The stroker then applies firm grounding pressure to the strokee’s thighs and gives the “noticing” step, a neutral and non-judgmental observation about the strokee’s genitals. He then does a lube stroke and strokes the upper left-hand quadrant of her clitoris,” said Schiffer.
Although OM is slightly sexual because it is performed on the clitoris, the goal is to allow yourself to feel, without expectation or judgment. With OM, both partners learn to embrace the female body and the sensations that may occur during stimulation. It also encourages open and honest communication, as the stroker and strokee must be honest with themselves and their partner about the experience. This includes the stroker looking at her vulva and describing exactly what they see prior to “OMing” and sharing a “frame,” or a feeling they experienced, afterward.
“Orgasm, as experienced in OM, is a full ignition of the body and a saturated feeling throughout. There are many peaks and valleys in this type of orgasm. You may experience climax. But, you may not. It’s about the full ride of the experience,” said Daedone.