As a woman, your vagina can be a source of pleasure, insecurity, pride, love or a myriad of other feelings depending on the day. Sometimes what you see in print, in the media or online may not be representative of your vagina, causing further insecurities. But each vagina is uniquely made and beautiful its own right. There are so many reasons you should love and embrace your vagina.
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Your vagina is the source of life, a major pleasure center and each one distinctive and different. In other words, there is nothing like a vagina! If you want to learn more about the wonders of your vagina, you have come to the right place.
I spoke with Sexpert Tyomi, who is a sexuality coach, founder of Glamerotic101.com, Playboy Radio host, resident sexpert at Ebony.com and BlackDoctor.org contributing writer about this topic. Tyomi has been a sexpert for many years and often does videos on YouTube and workshops throughout the country to teach and empower women to own their sexuality.
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Here are Tyomi's top 5 tips she suggests to help you to have a healthier relationship with your vagina:
1. Your vagina is unique to you. Embrace it. No two vaginas are the same. Vaginas come in all shapes, lengths and sizes. Unfortunately, if you look at media or books, you may see little variance in vaginas. But, if you don’t see a vagina that looks exactly like yours, don’t be alarmed. Comparing your vagina to others is a losing proposition because each vagina is different. Go ahead and say it loud and proud, “I embrace my vagina for who ‘she’ is, uniquely mine!” You only have one vagina so learn to embrace and appreciate the beauty and uniqueness of yours.
Sexpert Tyomi Tip: “Don’t compare your vagina to what you see on charts, books and in the media. Each vagina is unique and created differently. And vulvas are even more diverse.”
2. Don’t be afraid to explore. There is only one way to understand the many remarkable facets of your vagina and that is by checking it out and taking some time to understand what your vagina looks like and how different regions feel. Trust me, this knowledge will be handy (no pun intended) in the long-term.
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Knowing the function, feel and texture of your vagina makes you more comfortable with your vagina. Remember that inside your vagina is your vulva. The vulva is the gateway to your uterus also known as your womb. It includes a double layer of protection provided by the folds of the outer and inner labia which are the visible folds you externally see on your vagina. These folds of skin surround and protect your clitoris as well as the opening of your vagina and urethra. And if you were not aware, your clitoris is the most sensitive and erogenous zone for sexual pleasure. It's time to start exploring!
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Sexpert Tyomi Tip: “Take a look down there! One of the best ways to become one with your vagina is knowing what it looks like when it’s healthy. Take a hand mirror and place it between your legs. Observe what your vulva looks like, parting its lips. Then lay on your back and spread your legs to get a full view of your vagina. This will help you to gain an understanding of the parts contained within the vulva.”
3. Use natural products to keep your vagina clean. Water is your vagina’s friend. Make sure that you are cautious of using soaps and perfumes on or in your vagina. Try to use natural and organic products in your bathing routine. The vagina is a sensitive zone and chemicals found in soaps and perfumed bathing products can easily disrupt your vagina’s natural PH levels.
When these PH levels become disturbed in your vagina, they can cause bacterial vaginosis and other infections. These infections can produce strong odors and other issues. Laundry detergents can also be the culprits of causing itchiness in your vagina so try to use natural detergent. Finally, if you are sexually active, be aware of the ingredients found in sexual lubricants which can also throw off your PH balance. Try organic options or use something with ingredients that are plant-based (no petroleum oils).
Always be aware of what your vagina smells like in its healthy state. Being aware of your natural smell will be beneficial, so you know when something is off about your vagina’s ecosystem. A good place to learn the basics about vaginal health is from your gynecologist.
Sexpert Tyomi Tip: “You are what you eat, so eating leafy greens and fresh fruit helps keep the vagina in balance and drink plenty of water. An alkaline-based diet helps with maintaining the vagina's balanced pH levels. The vagina is naturally a self-cleaning organ, but taking a fresh water bath at least once a month helps with maintaining balance as well. This is particularly useful after a woman's monthly cycle. Allowing the vagina to breathe by wearing cotton underwear or going without panties while asleep at night is another recommended tip.”
4. Keep it tight. You probably exercise to keep your muscles on your body tone and fit. The same principle of exercise applies to your vagina. You must exercise your vaginal muscles to maintain this muscle’s tone and strength. The best way to do this is by doing Kegels. Kegels involve squeezing and relaxing the muscles around the vagina. The best part of this exercise is you can do it at anytime or anywhere. When you go to urinate, you can also practice by urinating then stopping your urine flow, then releasing your urine as a way to strengthen these muscles.
Sexpert Tyomi Tip: “The vagina is a muscle that must be worked out to maintain its shape and strength. Do a set of 12 reps of Kegels at least three times a day by clenching your vaginal muscles and then releasing them. Kegels help women become more aware of how the vagina works, and it can help to create a stronger orgasm.”
5. Self-pleasure is self-care. If you are not aware of what turns you on, how can you set this expectation with someone else? You can’t! When you learn to please yourself, you learn to communicate this to your partner as well. According to a Cosmopolitan survey, women are severely deficient when it comes to orgasms. Knowing what turns you on and pleases you is one of the first steps to helping you become more satisfied in a sexual relationship with your partner.
If you have sex toys, and they are not porous, made of PVC or are jelly in texture and smell like chemicals be cautious, as they may increase risk of infection. Use natural alternatives and make sure you clean your toys before and after each use with natural products. Remember, these toys are going into your vagina.
Sexpert Tyomi Tip: “Self-pleasure allows for a woman to know where her pleasure zones are within her vulva and vagina and helps her become comfortable with how her vulva changes as she becomes aroused. The power of touch helps with establishing a connection, and the more a woman explores herself between her legs, the more she can become connected with her lady bits.
Tyomi goes on to state that a woman can learn how to embrace her vagina by realizing how powerful it is. Every human being walking the face of this earth has come through the sacred canal, and that fact alone is powerful! Women are master creators, and it is the vagina that births life. Embracing that fact alone can help any woman learn how to accept and love what's between her legs.”
When you embrace your vagina, you will also have a healthier relationship with it and yourself. In your journey as a woman, learning to love and embrace this unique part of yourself helps to empower you not just sexually, but mentally and emotionally as well. It is one of your many powerful assets and should be held by you in the highest regard.
