Most would say communication is key to a healthy relationship. I’d have to agree. However, not all communication supports a healthy relationship. There are some communication habits that make matters worse.
Relationships don’t usually end because of the challenges. They end because of our responses to those challenges. Does your response support the growth of a relationship or its failure? If your communication style is listed below, you’re probably supporting its failure.
Passive Aggression
You ever met someone who says “yes” when you both know they really mean “no”? Or you ask them an open-ended question and they respond with “ok.” Maybe they don’t even respond at all. These are all examples of passive-aggressive behavior.
Your partner could be passive-aggressive because they fear speaking up. On the other hand, they could be passive-aggressive in order to punish you.
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Either way, passive-aggressiveness ruins relationships as it rarely leads to finding a solution to the challenges your relationship is experiencing.
Finger Pointing
When you find yourself listing things your partner does wrong, you’re probably finger-pointing. Remember, you can’t punish another adult. No one wants to feel like they’re in a relationship with a parent. Avoid attaching your partner to the action. Though they might have done something disappointing, it’s not necessarily who they are.
Instead of saying “You’re a horrible listener.” Say “When you don’t remember our conversations, I feel like you’re not listening to me”
One puts your partner in a position to defend themselves. The other gives them an opportunity to engage.
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