Facebook and Twitter is always filled with messages, status updates and memes containing words of wisdom for those who are in the dating pool waiting to find true love. Many of these status updates come from people who have passed through the ropes of courting and have now ended up on the side of commitment through holy matrimony, while others contain information from those who have become bitter because of relationships that missed the mark of happiness. It can be difficult sometimes for a woman who doesn’t know a thing about the standards of dating and the “rules” that follow them to know just exactly what to do to land the heart of a man who has caught her attention, but world renowned celebrity relationship coach Tony Gaskins always has a great message for women looking to land the men they deserve.
In a recent Facebook post, Tony spoke about the most common mistake women make when dating: praising a boyfriend. What he meant by praise is the extra effort and support women give to the men they are simply courting that haven’t yet promised her a lifetime of commitment.
She cooks, cleans and has sex with him on command, remains faithful and loyal and even moves in with him. Tony made it a point to encourage women to stop praising boyfriends and to refrain from giving everything before a lifelong commitment has been promised. “Why would a man work to have a woman if she is giving everything willingly with little effort being given to earn her,” Tony rhetorically asks to get the attention of his woman audience.
His advice to women who give too much too soon in a relationship is to “close your legs and open your mind to get to know a man before giving everything.” This is a solid piece of advice for any woman looking for long term/lifetime commitment from a man. It is natural for a woman to be giving and nurturing, but giving in abundance before a man has said the words “I choose you for life” only places a woman in a position to be taken advantage of.
There needs to be a cap put on the amount a woman gives to a man before securing a future with him. After all, if one gives it all away in the beginning there is nothing to look forward to. It’s ok to be caring and nurturing to a boyfriend, however, it takes some reservation in order to turn the relationship from a courtship to a marriage. Time should be taken to sincerely get to know a person mentally and spiritually. When a man has to work to earn the affections of a woman, it is much more appreciated than when it is simply given out of the feeling of having to keep a man satisfied.
For the single and still searching women out there, try Tony’s advice and see how it works for you. Don’t give up too much too soon.
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Glamazon Tyomi is a freelance writer, model and sex educator with a deeply rooted passion for spreading the message of sex positivity and encouraging the masses to embrace their sexuality. Her website, www.sexperttyomi.com, reaches internationally as a source for advice and information for the sexually active/curious. Follow her on Twitter at @glamazontyomi.