• Skip to main content
  • Skip to secondary menu
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer
BlackDoctor.org
Where Wellness & Culture Connect

Where Wellness & Culture Connect

  • Conditions
  • Wellness
  • Lifestyle
  • Longevity
  • Clinical Trials
  • Resources
    • Generational Health
    • Top Blacks in Healthcare 2025
    • Hall Of Fame
    • Clinical Trials Resource Center
    • Obesity Resource Center
    • Cancer Resource Center
    • Wellness on the Yard
    • Immunocompromised Care
    • BDO Resource Library
  • Find A Doctor
  • BDO TV
Home / Health Conditions / Mental Health / 21 Things Holding You Back

21 Things Holding You Back

 

holding you backLife is filled with some amazing things. It's also filled with some amazingly-frustrating things that can potentially damage your health, and hold you back from experiencing more of life's joys.

Wondering how to improve your life? Be more mindful of the things holding you back, such as:

1. Your Pen. Or pencil, or whatever you use to write stuff down, but never do. That's right, I said it. Most successful people have a written plan or guide or something tangible that constantly refers them to their goals. Listen, folks can talk all day about what they're "GOING TO DO", but people that actually do it have it written down somewhere. Start writing down your goals and posting them.

You May Also Like
Psoriatic Arthritis Can Feel Beyond Your Control. Consider a Different Direction. Learn More Here. Psoriatic Arthritis Can Feel Beyond Your Control. Consider a Different Direction. Learn More Here.

2. Mean/Uncomfortable Messages and Images. These negative exchanges can be in your text or internet history. You save them, then you re-read them, but they only make you feel angry and terrible all over again. Delete them.

3. Subscriptions To Stores You Can't Afford. They send you tons of emails and texts about the sales you should not be spending money on. Unsubscribe. Now.

SIGN UP FOR OUR NEWSLETTER HERE!

You May Also Like
Get GLP-1s Delivered to You As Low As $99/Month! Get GLP-1s Delivered to You As Low As $99/Month!

4. Bitterness. Do you find yourself thinking about the things that your friends or coworkers have, that you might not be able to afford or have time for? Stop. Focus on being more grateful for the things you DO have. If there is something you dream about obtaining, figure out a workable plan to get it.

5. "Perfect" Expectations. So many people get hung up on the idea of finding the "perfect" significant other, or someone who is going to make you feel better about yourself and fix your problems. Take more responsibility for taking better care of yourself, and realize that true improvement only comes from within. Also, understand that it's not fair to use other people as fixers. Each of us comes with our own flaws, needs and responsibilities to self, so to expect someone else to be your version of "perfect" and to take care of all your needs is not only immature, but selfish.

6. Pointless Facebook Friendships. Sometimes you stay friends with an ex just so you can keep them around just in case, or to occasionally stalk their new significant other. Or, you maintain online friendships with people you don’t really know, don’t care about, and who post ridiculous things that always make you roll your eyes. Unfriend.

7. Trying To Keep Up With Everybody. Many people keep up with all their friends professionally, even if they don’t want the same things or have the same backgrounds, just so that they can impress them on social media or at parties. Maintain friendships/positive networks with people you truly care about.

YOU MAY ALSO LIKE: The 3 Toxic Things Your Body Has To Endure Every Day

8. The Wrong Magazine Subscriptions. Do you have subscriptions to magazines that make you feel ugly, fat, poor, and unstylish? You shouldn't.

9. The Wrong Friends. Why are you still "friends" with the people who only like to hang out with you when it involves drinking and spending a lot of money? Some of them aren’t that interested in being around you or hearing what you have to say anyway, right? Focus on healthier friendships.

10. Name-Brand Needs. Your desire for the name-brand/latest version of everything isn't necessary. Especially if the generic brand or off-brand version is just as good. Or, if you could get the same item at an outlet store, as long as you were willing to wait a season.

11. Pictures of yourself. Stop torturing yourself by obsessing over the photos of yourself where you think you look so much better. You need to feel great about who you are NOW.

12. Old Clothes. All of the old clothes and accessories that you no longer wear or use, and are just cluttering up your closet? Donate them to people who would actually use them.

13. Junk Food.  If you know there's the potential that you're going to binge-eat that package of cookies, bag of chips, etc., don't buy it. Or, buy it, and share it with other people.

14. DIY More. You do not need to go to a coffee shop on the way to work every single morning to get breakfast/coffee. You could just as easily take a few minutes to prepare things yourself most days and save hundreds or thousands of dollars a year.

15. Guilt Over Debt. At some point in their lives, most people live with debt. Feeling guilty or ashamed about it doesn't make that debt go away. Formulating a plan to pay off that debt, and be more financially stable does make that debt go away.

16. Obsessing Over "The Best Time Of Your Life." Memories of the time that you label “the best time of your life" makes you consciously feel as though everything else you do just doesn't compare. Which isn't fair to you or the people you spend time with. In addition, it severely limits your ability to make/appreciate new experiences that could potentially be just as, or even, more, rewarding.

17. Old Medicine. Read expiration dates, and only take medication for the current ailment you're dealing with.

18. Relationship Resentment.  Your friends are in happy relationships, but you're not. Feel happy for them, and stop defeating your own potential future relationship happiness by saying that love will never find you. Unless you have a crystal ball. Which you probably don't.

19. Toxic Relationships. It doesn't matter if it's a romantic relationship or a family member. You deserve healthy relationships. People who only make you feel terrible about yourself need to be avoided. Yes, this is much easier said than done, but it's still true.

20. "THEY." Who exactly are "they" anyway? "They" can say a lot of things, but are all of them true or correct? Leave "them" behind.

21. "Too Much" or "Too little". Oftentimes when we hear that we are "too young", "too old", "too big", "too small" etc, it can get ingrained in our thoughts. But don't let it. We are all in a constant state of change/improvement. And that doesn't take away from how awesome you already are.

 

Visit the BlackDoctor.org General Health center for more articles and tips. 

By Derrick Lane | Published November 1, 2013

The Latest In Mental Health

mental illness

12 Early Signs Of a Mental Illness

Anxiety disorders often go hand in hand with depression and other mental illnesses. People who have anxiety disorders struggle with intense and uncontrollable feelings of anxiety, fear, worry, and/or panic. These feelings can interfere with daily activities and may last read more about 12 Early Signs Of a Mental Illness
seasonal depression

Feeling SAD? 5 Ways to Combat Seasonal Depression

As the sun sets earlier and the temperature continues to drop, some of us may be fearing for the season that lies ahead. While fall and winter bring joyful holidays, like Thanksgiving and Christmas, it can also be a time read more about Feeling SAD? 5 Ways to Combat Seasonal Depression
everyday habits

5 Everyday Habits That Will Steal ALL Your Energy

The average day for the average adult is filled with enough tasks, responsibilities, and to-do lists to make it a constant challenge to stay energized. Between work, family, social commitments, and everything in between, many of us find ourselves running read more about 5 Everyday Habits That Will Steal ALL Your Energy
self-diagnosis

Self-Diagnosis or Self-Awareness? Knowing When to Seek Help

If you’ve ever scrolled through social media and thought, “Wait, that sounds like me…” — you’re not alone. Whether it’s a TikTok about anxiety, a thread on trauma, or a meme about burnout, mental health is everywhere online right now. read more about Self-Diagnosis or Self-Awareness? Knowing When to Seek Help
chaos

Thriving Through Chaos: 7 Small Changes That Make a Big Difference

To many, the concept of mental wellness can feel overwhelming, a huge goal requiring massive overhauls. However, Atlanta-based community psychiatrist Dr. Nina Joy Mena, known as Dr. NJoy, believes that a proactive approach built on small, intentional changes is the read more about Thriving Through Chaos: 7 Small Changes That Make a Big Difference

World Mental Health Day 2025: How Taraji and Charlamagne Are Changing the Conversation

For years, World Mental Health Day has been about raising awareness, breaking stigma, sharing stats, and posting quotes. But this year, it’s less about talking and more about doing. “Awareness” alone isn’t cutting it. For Black America, mental health isn’t read more about World Mental Health Day 2025: How Taraji and Charlamagne Are Changing the Conversation

Primary Sidebar

Subscribe to our newsletter

Icon

Caring for You, Too - Caregiver Workbook

1 file(s) 297 KB
Download

Trending Articles

10 Home Remedies for Toothache

Remedy for tooth pain

10 Foods That Naturally Lower Cholesterol

foods that lower cholesterol

The #1 MISSED Health Screening Among Black Folks

health screening

5 Worst Fabrics for Sensitive Skin

sensitive skin

4 Ways To Boost Your Metabolism & Prevent Weight Gain During The Holidays

how to boost your metabolism
Find a Culturally Sensitive Doctor

Footer

Where Wellness & Culture Connect

BDO is the world’s largest and most comprehensive online health resource specifically targeted to African Americans. BDO understands that the uniqueness of Black culture - our heritage and our traditions - plays a role in our health. BDO gives you access to innovative new approaches to the health information you need in everyday language so you can break through the disparities, gain control and live your life to its fullest.

Connect With Us

Resource Centers

  • Top Blacks in Healthcare
  • Clinical Trials
  • Wellness on the Yard
  • Cancer
  • Immunocompromised Care
  • About Us
  • Privacy Policy
  • Cookie Policy
  • Terms of Service
  • Careers
  • Advertise With Us
  • Advertising & Sponsorship Policy
  • Daily Vitamina
  • TBH

Copyright © 2025, Black Doctor, Inc. All rights reserved.